Weird Relish Mustard and Bad Beans

Growing up my Grandparents lived on the river. Their house was across the street, but they owned property on the river, too. On the river, they had a neat little patio type area where they grilled and sat to watch the water. During the summer months, they loved to have weenie roasts. We would play horse shoes, swim, boat, and run around. Grandpa would grill hotdogs.

The sides at these weenie roasts varied widely, as did the toppings. Many times we had strange chips Grandma had gotten from her couponing or weird flavored beans. My least favorite part of this meal was always the pickle relish premixed with mustard all in a squeeze bottle. I don't know whose bright idea it was to make such a condiment, but I was not a fan and Grandma loved it and always encouraged that we use it. We rarely had normal buns. Sometimes we had the extra long weenies and when we did we would have short buns. Most of the time we had some kind of potato buns. I am pretty sure Grandma bought them on sale often.

One of the most memorable hot dog meals was when my brother and I were in high school. I was driving by then, so I was at least 16-17 and my brother is 2 years younger. Grandma and Grandpa insisted that we invite friends. So we invited a friend that had met them on numerous occasions. It was during the heat of summer so we swam and played in the river. We dove off the dock and went out on the paddle boat. Then, Grandma called us to the table.

We dried off and went up the steps to the table and the grill. She had some strange flavor of canned beans that day. They were an awful flavor, one that is no longer for sale. We all took the smallest spoonful possible for politeness sake. There were Lays Potato Chips that day too. Grandma hovered over us with the pot of beans as we sat down to eat. She asked repeatedly if we wanted more beans. We all answered, "No thank you." Then, our poor friend, she asked so many times he finally said yes after the tenth or fifteenth time. So she gave him probably half the can of beans or more. He politely sat and choked down as much as he could, until she got up and went to the house for something she forgot. When she did that he fed them to the fishes.

I love these weenie roasts and miss the days of good hot dogs, weird sides, and family time. The laughs then and now are worth the weird relish mustard and bad beans.